Only I don't wear glasses and the last time I wore my hair like that I was about 4 years old. |
The movie I'm going to review today is The Descent.
The Descent is a British Film directed by Neil Marshall. It stars a whole bunch of gorgeous ladies that haven't starred in any major films. The cast includes, but is not limited to: Shauna MacDonald, Natalie Mendoza, and Alex Reid.
So what's this creep-tastic film about, El Capitain? You may ask. Well, dear reader, this movie is about a group of long-time British Gal Pals that travel to America to go on a Spelunking adventure.
Claustrophobics BEWARE
Right off the bat, the film sets a terrible feeling with a foreboding musical score (inspired, perhaps, by The Shining's opening scene? No doubt). Though the first bit of the film is innocent enough, we can't help but get the creeps. Perhaps it was the cold, damp forests of the Appalachian mountains, or the jarring flashbacks of a brutal car accident endured by Sarah (the film's protagonist played by Shauna MacDonald).
Beautiful... but eerie. |
The ladies are supposedly going to explore Borhem Caverns, a touristy cave system. Little do they know, Juno (the troupe's adventure-seeker and wrong-doer) has taken them to an unexplored cave...
Does this look safe to you!?!? |
Now, one thing about this movie that I thoroughly respect, is that it followed almost all the rules of a perfect horror film.
1. Isolation
2. Darkness
3. Suspense
4. Surprises
Of course part of the tunnel caves in. It had to happen. Now our little spelunkers are trapped in the dark.
Very bad things are about to happen... |
In the dark, in an uncharted cave system.
OH THE HORROR! |
If you pay close attention during the movie, you can see creepy figures climbing about the walls. It was at this point in the movie my inner coward said:
LEAVE! Leave, Damn you! Save yourself the torture and just get the hell out of dodge before something really bad happens!
But my inner champ said:
ONWARDS! |
Of course I listen to my inner champ.
Let's do this. |
The troupe presses onwards into the dark depths of the cave, trying to find a way out. Those of you that are afraid of the dark, or closed in spaces, this movie is perfect for you! The majority of this film is so dark, so eerie, that you find yourself straining your eyes, trying to see around the characters.
As a side note, does anyone else do that? Over-opening your eyes in hopes that you will magically develop cat-vision and see in the dark?
Yeah. That. |
Anyways. Back to the movie. It isn't too awfully long before we see the first creature. And BOY is it ever a shocker!
SURPRISE! |
I hate that. Something creeping right over your shoulder in the dark? Blhiahfsafhjf. Talk about scary. If you didn't get startled, or jump during that scene, you should be given some kind of award.
'gratz. You don't have the brain power to register a startling predator. |
The film progresses as any other horror film. The group splits up, the humanoid cave dwellers get vicious, and people's head lamps start breaking. Great. So its dark, cramped, and crawling with scary thingies that like biting people's throats out. Wonderful.
D: |
All in all, the more I see this movie, the creepier it seems to get. I found it extremely uncomfortable. It's loaded with SURPRISE! Jump-scenes, right from the start. I can almost guarentee you'll make a mad dash for your bed, hide under the covers, and hold your breath.
..... or maybe that was just me.
I would recommend this film. Although it wasn't psychologically stimulating, or a real terror-fest; it was pretty scary, and prompted a feeling of dread in the audience.
Oh. And the ending.
Whaa? Noo D: |
I'll let you see for yourselves ;)
El Capitain OUT!
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